Smooch

I write weekly about the strategies, habits, and tactics around cultivating the connections that matter to you.

Close your eyes for a second.

Wait. Read the next paragraph, then do it. Sorry.

Imagine you’re sitting at your desk, plowing through an endless pile of internal emails. Your phone buzzes, as it is wont to do every ten seconds anyway. Initially assuming it’s a routine notification from some social app begging for attention, you see the name of someone you met for coffee a few months back. You two had hit off, but haven’t stayed in touch, like most people you meet. Until now. All it says is “Hey, you just came to mind this morning. Hope you’re great!”

OK, try that now, eyes closed and all that jazz. How does it feel? Pretty good, right?

There are three questions we’re always asking:

1. Who should I talk to?

2. When should I talk to them?

3. What can I do to maintain the relationship?

I used to think that #3 meant loads of research, cutco knives, and courtside seats.

Not anymore.

Now it’s as simple as “Can I help? All good? You need anything?” - which famed Hollywood agent Ari Emanuel will send to hundreds of his contacts every day.

Or even “smooch” from Tasshin’s guide to friendship - wherein he argues that one of the most effective way to maintain a friendship is a simple “just thinking of you.”

Four or five years ago, I would have thought too simple to be ineffective. And simple is stupid, right?

I’m a convert now.

As I’ve spent more time understanding about the psychology behind it - by expressing “Hey! I care about you!” in even the slightest sense, we’re appealing to everyone’s deep desire to be seen and be connected. To know we’re not alone.

It also happens to have generated an incredible amount of business opportunities for my clients. I’ve helped thousands of people build the following practice.

Here, try this

• Whether it’s in your list of text messages, call history, LinkedIn, or even the sent folder of your email…

• Scroll down a few pages, until you come across someone you had a good connection with but haven’t spoken to in some time (hence them being lower on the list)

• If you have something to say, great, do it. Most of us will draw a blank, most of the time. So just say “Hey! You came to mind this morning. Hope you’re doing well!”

That’s it.

Smooch.

-Zvi

BTW - Yes, this is for your “business” contacts too. Because we want the people we want to know/like/trust us to know/like/trust us, right?

If you found this valuable, have you snagged my course on cultivating your network?

I’ve spent the past 12 years helping people like you grow their businesses and careers by cultivating the relationships that matter. I took everything I’ve learned and practiced, and put it in a professionally produced online course.

You can grab it for free right now. ➡